Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Breakfast Beach Halloween

This was the first year Z actually wanted to dress up and go trick or treating. He's a late bloomer and never wanted to dress up and didn't care much for trick or treating. Still doesn't but I think school has got him a little more interested in it. He was shy asking for candy but it was good time. We beat the rain shower which started right after we made our loop and our friends showed up but we were done and it was pouring rain!

sorry r's tail looks like a wiener! =(

I have been cooking somewhat. Z likes pancakes..or so he says. Everytime I make them he only eats a little but I think he just likes the idea of making them? Sort of like making cupcakes but not.

Sunday morning bfast

Shoyu chicken for the family. I don't eat meat but they rest of my family does so this is for them..

My mental health is suffering severely. Sometimes I am not sure what to do. Now that I am not nursing, I am able to take a half xanax when it gets really bad but I hate taking meds. But I will get severe pain in my stomach from anxiety and almost throwing up from it. Ugh I wish I could make it all stop but half the time I have no idea WHY I have these anxiety attacks. Sometimes I wonder if I should just start smoking weed to help..but I am not much of a smoker and I don't know what's worse, drugs or weed...help!!!!!!! I am trying to keep it together for my family so I can still function but my mind and body is in turmoil..I know part of it is my body and how I hate it. I play Kinect Sports and you can see the video of yourself after you are done and I see how fat I am and it's depressing and I am determined to lose that last 15-20 pounds I have been saying I will lose from the baby..it's almost 2 years..there is no excuse!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!