Monday, January 15, 2018

Return of Family Hikes - Mount Whitney Trail Lone Pine Lake

We haven't taken the boys on long hikes in a long time.  Maybe over two years!  I used to take them on long hikes weekly and short ones in between before or after work.  Ever since we have gotten so busy with work and all my pains in my body that prevent me from doing any kind of workout, it kind of fell through the cracks.

We have been making a point to do day tips and road trips whenever we can in the last year and we decided to do a hike yesterday.  I love it so much and have always wanted my boys to grow up being explorers and appreciate nature and what it has to offer.  We wanted to get to Lone Pine Lake at Mount Whitney.  We knew it would be tiring from the review but we had no idea how tough it would be.

We definitely were not prepared for the distance, endurance and snow of this hike.  We got there and the road was closed for the winter.  We drove a little past the sign to the closest gate we could get to where other cars were parked.  From there, it was a good 2 mile hike just to get to the start of the trail.  All uphill!  Then we got to the starting point and it was uphill the entire way.  We encountered snow at the beginning and then it disappeared for 1/3 of the way up.  After that, we had more snow until the top.  The snow was deeper and deeper and we were all exhausted.  We had no snow shoes and now trekking poles making it even more difficult.  Especially for an 8 and 11 year old LOL.  There were so many stops and for my body, I wanted to badly to make it to the top to the lake but it was failing me.  The pain in my feet and hips and lower back were winning and I was almost in tears.  I am so frustrated with the constant pain that has plagued me with no answers to how to fix them.  I tend to try to push through it if I really want something but this was beyond painful.  I knew if I didn't stop, I may not be able to walk down back to the car.  I stopped and waited with the boys while Mathew went up another 45 minutes to check to see if he could see the lake but he said it would proabbly be another 30-45 minutes from where he was so he came back down to meet us at our waiting spot.  The snow was thick and we were freezing cold.  The sun was siappearing behind the mountain and we knew it was time to head back as it had already been over 3.5 hours up and would be about the same going back.  We didn't want to be stuck out there in the dark.

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By the time we were heading back down, it was slippery and scary and Rocket decided he had to poop.  Oh that was so much fun while he nearly pooped his pants and had to be butt naked while cleaning up in the snow!  HAHAH. Those are stories we have to tell when he gets older hahahah.  We slipped and fell many times on the way down and we were so glad we made it back safely.  It was cold and exhausting and the pain coming down was worse than going up and by the time we got to the car all I could do was tear up at frustration of my body.  The shattering pain that comes in my feet and hips and lower back screaming keeps winning and it makes me so upset that I cannot do what I would like to but I will figure it out..

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We all agreed that we would prepare better and knew the things we needed for the next REDO when we come back to tackle the lake.  Cannot wait for the next time!!!  It was absolutely gorgeous all the way up and could only imagine what the lake would be like.  The best part was driving back down and seeing two little Inyo Mule Deers hopping around in front of us.  That made my frustration pass and all I could do was smile =)



Wednesday, January 3, 2018

Everyday Reveals New Things

You know you are around the right person when everyday, there is something new you figure out about yourself that may or may not be good or need work.  Not on the account of that person actually telling you but realizing it on your own.

You never realize the things about yourself that needs adjusting if you are alone or just around friends who never quite speak the awful truth to you.  Mathew never tells me anything negative and is always the one who likes to make me smile, but I find myself catching the things I say or do and wanting to kick myself for how I feel it sounds or comes off.  I don't know if that makes sense but ever since we have been together, I have slowly and painfully realized that I may react or say something in a way that may be interpreted as not what I meant. 

Especially when I speak, I notice now that I am so flat or very monotone and matter of fact in my delivery that it can be interpreted as if I was upset, annoyed or just scolding rather than how I actually mean it to come out as just a statement and nothing more.  I catch myself doing it to my kids and him when I speak and now I am able to say after the fact that I hope it doesn't sound that way after it comes out because I am so not animated or sweet when stating a fact or something. 

I also find that I need a lot of work on myself mentally.  I always feel this inadequacy.  I feel like I am not good enough or not fabulous enough to be deserving of things.  It's a wierd thing to type and speak about because I know that it is silly but that is how I feel.  I go through phases where I just feel like I am not doing enough or not doing things right and feel awful that I can't do more and offer more.  I think it has a lot to do with letting myself be so much of a responsible adult/parent that I forget to pursue the things that would make me excited about myself and that leads me to feel like I can't offer excitement and passion of life to the table to anyone.  I always see this spark inside that comes out and shows the real me, when I do things spontaneously.  I see the impulsive old me that would just DO things and not think twice.  I thrive on that part of me and need to do more of that instead of always thinking about "Do I have enough for the next month?" "Can I do that?  I can't, I have to be here and can use it for a family activity one day" Etc..

I'd like to stop being so engulfed in whatever project I am working on and stop to smile and look up and acknowledge others.  Just because I'm in the middle of working and completely focused on finishing my work, it doesn't mean that I cannot take a 10 second pause to smile or look up at someone.  I find that I get so focused on work that I don't even hear anyone or look up from my work to smile.  I may say something but not actually look at you in the eyes and I catch myself doing it all the time and I want to smack myself in the face afterwards for doing it YET AGAIN! 

This year, I would like to work on changing my thought process.  Try to open my mouth to speak with less monotone and matter of fact tone and more engaged approach.  I would like to stop thinking that I am not enough and feeling like I have not enough to offer others just because others may have a more exciting lifestyle or career and I feel like an idiot all the time.  Just because I don't have a crazy college degree and glamour career and life experiences, I still have things that are worth more than that and shouldn't feel like a little mini human.  I need to start finding a way to stop thinking about whether I can do something because I could use that money for a family event in the future and do for myself and Mathew sometimes.  Biggest example was Black Friday there was a glitch in airfare and I had a chance to book flights for Mathew and I to New Zealand which has been on my bucketlist for years and I had it in my cart and almost bought them on a whim and last minute decided not to because I kept thinking that I could use that money for a family snowboarding trip in the future or something.  Rather than do something I wanted to do for myself I pushed it back for something else.  I need to start at least twice a year, to do something for just me or Mathew and I and stop feeling guilty about it. 

There are so many things I would like to adjust this year..I can't wait for all the good things to come. =)

Sunday, November 19, 2017

Serious Lack of Time and Energy

Life has been uphill, downhill and sideways the last few years and this year has been filled with many changes. Many good changes have come but has also made our life full with even less free time. I am finding it extremely hard to find interest in blogging and social media. The more and more I see everyone so consumed with it, the less I want to be around it. I have to use things for work all the time but when it comes to personal things, I find myself pulling away from keeping up with the digital world.  There is something about the way people see pictures and they imagine that's what your life is like.

No one seems to realize it's just a sliver of something you actually share of your personal life but in no way means that is how life is...You never see the struggles or hardships or lack of time..one picture portrays this crazy amazing life that viewers seem to think is what you're living when in reality your life is just the same as it's always been.  One photo doesn't mean we travel all the time and are having the time of our lives hanging out doing fun things..it's quite the opposite..we just post one thing that makes us smile while the days keep melding into one another with the same work life reality that we deal with on a daily...

I am finding myself looking forward to more and more outdoor time, turned off by the amount of time it takes to keep up with everything when you have no time to spare for genuine family time, I find it even harder to justify spending that precious time looking at Instagram and all other pointless things that do nothing but take away that little time that I do have.

The posts dates have gone further and further apart and I had wanted to spend less time writing one that was interesting and couldn't figure out why..until recently. I've been so busy working on the computer with my current job that when the day is done and I still have to work on organizing my better half's business and the kids and the skateboarding, by the time we sit down, all I want to do is unwind and spend 30 minutes laughing about something silly before bed..so apologies for being disconnected from everything but until I find that passion for blogging and keeping up with social media, I may just pop in and out sporadically..IT IS the holiday season for the rest of the year which means added craze! HAHAHAHA

Happy Thanksgiving! GET OUTSIDE AND EXPLORE..DAY TRIP ROAD TRIP ANYTHING!

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Friday, September 8, 2017

Art, Beats Lyrics Prep + Catching up at Home

Trying to gather my thoughts over the past month or two.  It's been a whirlwind but when is it not?

We spent a good amount of time preparing for ABL and setting up at the warehouse.  It was super hot and nasty.  I think we spent many 10 hour days in there just dirty and sweaty.  It was a lot of fun and a lot of hard work.  The end result of all the setup was worth it.

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We did get to spend some time with family out in North Carolina which was pretty awesome.  We normally don't even had more than a few hours in and out on our trips but we actually had a day or two here and there which was so nice to have a moment to relax with them and catch up.  We didn't schedule any meetings and it was so nice to NOT be running around trying to fit everything in.

Catching up at home before we head out again, we had a ton of car issues!  First with Mat and his ticket, then the Versa getting in an accident.  It was deemed a total loss.  It was bittersweet to see it go because that was my first car since moving away from Hawaii and it has been through many miles with so many memories between us but it was time.  Then Costco car wash ripped off my roof racks and scratched my car pretty bad so now just waiting for them to get back to us about fixing our car!  When it rains, it pours.

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Things are looking up though..I did get to start a new chapter with work and I'm super excited.  I have been working for an awesome lady on the days I wasn't working at my regular job at the warehouse..and she asked me to work only for her..so I made my mind up a few weeks ago to take her up on it and this week was my last day at the warehouse!  So excited to be working for her only and being able to work from home is an added plus.  It works out with my travels which will make it easier to be mobile if we need to.  I get to learn so many new things with her and it's addicting!  So, for every crazy obstacle we face, we always have a light at the end of the tunnel.  Trying to figure out why things happen.  I truly believe everything happens for a reason and we just have to wait and see why what happens happens..until then, just keep looking ahead for a sign =)

We did have a datenight for once.  We have had no time to do anything but our friend got us tickets to The Taste of LA again this year.  We got to go on a surprise date last year when he surprised me with it and he wanted to do it again this year.  It was so hot and the food vendors weren't nearly as good as last year but it was so much fun just doing something on our own without the kids and not work related.  We got to see friends out there and it was nice to have a moment of adulting LOL.

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We spent the last of the summer before school starts taking the boys skating to fun places.  The Juice Magazine party was so fun.  The boys got to skate with some awesome kids and we kept thinking how cool skate families are.  Most normal parents would not let their kids stay out late skating on a school night with loud crazy people everywhere and tons of long hair boys!

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Until next time..

Thursday, July 6, 2017

June Bithdays, Family and Gardening

Mathew and I have birthdays that are 6 days apart...and the funny part is that we both don't celebrate or make it a big deal.  We aren't present giving people and we don't like to take time to do special things for ourselves and have people know that it's our birthdays.  We are a strange pair aren't we?

The boys spent time in the bathroom setting up such a cute little happy birthday to me when I got home from work.  Sad part was, I was so busy working on more work when I got home that I hadn't even gone to the bathroom for at least 2 hours after I got home and didn't even see it until I got up to pee before we had to go to tend the garden!  It was such a sweet gesture.  I am very uncomfortable with people paying attention to me so birthdays are strange for me.  I am almost unhappy more than happy on that day!

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For Mathew's birthday, he had to work and take Rocket to his first class after winning the Intro2skate contest and he ended up spending all day driving and class and driving some more.  I had planned to cook him a nice dinner and cake and it was so nice to have his mom and step mom here for our birthdays.
 

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We were so busy the entire time they were here working and it feels like we never get enough time to just relax and hang out.  They helped us get our garden set up and we have so much to learn about gardening!!!  They all just left and the house seems so empty without them.

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Cannot wait til we get our life a little less hectic and have time to look back at all of this and laugh! =)

Sunday, June 4, 2017

Ziggy and Rocket Jo Psyched at San Pedro Shred Fest

We took a break from work to take the boys to check out the San Pedro Shred Fest.  It was our first time and it was such an amazing event.  So stoked the boys started skating because it has exposed them to such a great community and culture.  They are so obsessed with skating..especially Rocket.  And the drive to try even harder is growing as they get to know more of the amazing people who are around them.

We got there early and they got to skate the street course and downhill course before it got super crowded.  They also had the most AMAZING free swag.  They got a new set of pads and helmet and won a new Duster cruiser cork skateboard.  They are so excited to skate it at the beach one night.

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They did get themselves a SPSA shirt to support the community.  It was nice to see how much everyone is so passionate about saving Channel Street Skatepark and we can't wait to have the boys volunteer when it becomes available.  Andy from the SPSA was very nice and said it looks to be moving forward...crossing fingers!!!

Their most memorable part was skating with their skatepark buddy all day and meeting Daewon Song.  He signed their helmets and skateboards and gave them pointers.  What an humble and awesome skater.  Genuinely passionate and caring about the kids and the future.

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Can't wait to go again next year!!!